aging parents

Healthcare Declarations

Staci2 Comments

In my years as an RN, I’ve seen way too many patients and families left with difficult end of life issues. It’s not a topic most people like to discuss, because let’s face it, nobody likes to talk about death or loosing a loved one. But I do believe it is so very important! This goes along with my last post on aging parents (check it out).


Healthcare declarations are not just for the elderly and sick, either! Legally, 18 year olds are adults when it comes to medical decision making. And only 7% of those 18 to 29 have any sort of advance directive. Most people assume that family members will make decisions on your behalf in the event of illness or injury. Too many times this ends in heartache, confusion, and possibly even in court if members are in disagreement over your care.


Types of Advanced Directives

Advance directives are usually referred to as the combination of living wills and healthcare proxy documents, including durable power of attorney for healthcare.

Living Wills: A living will is your health care declaration, not to be confused with a conventional will or living trust used to leave property at death. A living will states what type of medical treatment you do or do not wish to receive if you are too ill or injured to direct your own care. Ideally, these should be as specific as possible. Directives as to artificial hydration and nutrition, treatments like dialysis and chemotherapy/radiation, and surgeries should be addressed here.

DNR, or Do Not Resuscitate, Order: A DNR order is written and signed by a doctor, instructing healthcare providers not to do CPR if your breathing or heart stops. These are usually done near the end of life or if you have a life-limiting illness. A DNR order does not address other treatments.

Physician Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment (POLST): A POLST form is like a DNR, but they cover much more. They must be signed by a medical doctor and usually in life-limiting situations (near end of life, or a life threatening illness). They include a DNR order as well as addressing other medical treatments like breathing and feeding tubes and antibiotics. POLST forms are available in most states, although they might have different names (MOST form in NC).

A lawyer is not needed to create these specific documents. It is important, however, to know about laws in your specific state. For example, in Florida, a DNR order must be printed on yellow paper for it to be legally valid. Also, Florida does not have its own form for a POLST yet.

Resources

Here are some books I came across, too, that might be of interest and helpful.





Like I said before, I’ve seen more than enough end of life heartache and despair throughout my career. I’ve seen families ripped apart by decisions and opinions regarding a loved ones final days. I feel like a lot of these situations could have been a tad easier had there been advanced care planning in some form. Or at the very least, some sort of conversation.

Let me know your thoughts on this difficult topic! ❤️

Aging Parents

Staci6 Comments

I keep hearing more and more stories of frustration when it comes to caring for aging parents, and it breaks my heart! Nobody likes to think about their parents getting to the point of not being able to care for themselves. Or even worse, when an event such as a fall, broken bone, or illness causes them to suddenly not be able to care for themselves.

Interestingly enough, I came across an article as I was doing some research on this topic that completely piqued my interest. After reading this article, I actually paused and had to rethink, therefore even erase parts of this post! It made me think about the other side to the coin. How are our “aging parents” actually feeling about this stage in their lives? Is loss of independence a big issue?

Although my original intention for this post was going to be resources and tips, I’ve actually been consumed with looking at this from a different angle. I could get lost in the psychology of aging, but I’ll spare you the details! The bottom line for me is that studies have shown that some older adults fear losing their independence more than death. Knowing this means learning that patience and planning are the keywords.

Planning and Patience

Coping with the loss of independence can take time. There may be loss of mobility, social isolation, memory impairment, hearing and vision loss, not to mention the death of loved ones and friends. Helping older adults come to terms with these changes is key.

That being said, patience is not always easy and that’s where planning comes in. I’ve found multiple articles, blogs, and websites that talk about how important planning for the future is. And that doesn’t just mean planning for the usual life events. That means coming up with a plan for caring for the older loved ones in your family, too.

Planning and patience are no small feat when it comes to this topic. I found this article and thought it very useful. Their five steps to creating a caregiving plan for your family are so important:

  • Prepare to talk
  • Form a team
  • Assess needs
  • Make a plan
  • Take action

Unfortunately, I’ve seen my fair share of situations that have left families in despair when they’ve been unprepared for the inevitable. This includes having that difficult discussion about end of life care and choices (more on that later!).

Resources

Of course every family, individual, and situation is different. Even the best laid plans don’t always pan out. That’s why I think it’s so important to have lots of resources at your disposal, along with a lot of support. Here’s some of the articles and websites I found helpful:

  • National Council on Family Relations: ncfr.org

I hope this blog post has been helpful to even one person, or maybe shared with someone who will find it useful. Do you have any tidbits to add to my thoughts? Let me know!

✌️❤️👩‍⚕️